Forty-seven today · 19 October 2026 · sung by your very own barbarian
A little something has been waiting for you…
click the present to unwrap
DE-STRESSING — FOR HIM
Ticket valid for one (1) very patient, sugar-free birthday boy.
Redeemable only once we reach Hanoi — a few weeks from now,
somewhere between Luang Prabang and Chiang Mai.
Patience, my love. It's part of the gift. ♥
Can't find the song — put song.mp3 next to this file
(or set AUDIO_SRC at the top of the script).
"Come on, babe —"
"Candles are lit, horns are hot —
the whole joint's been waiting for the man I've got!"
Ten years ago you ambled through my door,
cool as January — and honey, I wanted more.
Five years my husband now, and darling, it's true:
I'd say "I do" tomorrow — and the day after, too!
Oh, Rinaldo — you're forty-seven,
and I'm your very own barbarian,
you rolled a natural twenty on my heart —
you don't take your sugar,
but heaven knows you're sweet enough —
so come on, babe, let the big brass strut!
Most nights you'll find us lost in Faerûn — our dice going clack, clack, clack,
I'm the big ol' barbarian, honey — and you watch my back.
You keep our little party standing, we always make it through,
and this rage I keep on raging? Babe, it only burns for you!
Oh, Rinaldo — you're forty-seven,
and I'm your very own barbarian,
you rolled a natural twenty on my heart —
you don't take your sugar,
but heaven knows you're sweet enough —
so come on, babe, let the big brass strut!
(In a few short weeks, my love — two whole months, just us:
Laos. Vietnam. Thailand.
Luang Prabang. Hanoi. Chiang Mai.
And in Hanoi — mon amour — a little something with your name on it:
steam bath… full-body massage… refreshing body scrub… pampering body wrap…
"De-stressing, for him…"
Oh yes, darling — "him" means YOU.)
Two months of markets, temples, riverboats and streets —
hand in hand with my Rinaldo, the whole world at our feet!
So come on, Rinaldo — you're forty-seven,
and I'm your very own barbarian,
ten years in, and I'd do it all again —
you're sugar-free and still the sweetest thing around,
so blow those candles out… and paint the town!
(Happy birthday, my love — from your barbarian…)
Rinaaaldo!… and all that jazz!